Laven Week 2015!
by VeridianSoul
Summary: Happy Laven week everyone!
1. Obsession In Miles

**~*Sorry this is so short guys! I was on a homestay in Japan for a month so I didn't have much time to write so everything I have for Laven week will be fairly short. I hope you enjoy!*~**

You know you're in love when every passing second is a question. What are they thinking? What are they doing? Are they smiling? Its always something like that it seems. It's nice when they are there to answer your questions and put your busy mind to rest, but sometimes it isn't that easy.

Relationships are all about being close. Close emotionally, mentally, and in varying degrees of physical proximity. Sometimes I feel like I'm close, but other times he seems too far away to feel my love even though his hair is tangled in my fingers. No matter how much I tell myself he's home he never really is, always living in some other country doing God knows what. While I'm home he's off seeing the world, spending time with his one true love, the one I stole him from.

Lavi has always been adventurous. When I first met him it was hard to tie him down long enough to even go to class. The stories of all the places in the world during our studies didn't do anything to numb the wanderlust I knew he felt with every passing second.

Somewhere along the line we started dating and even my presence couldn't keep him down. Despite taking a backseat to his plans I couldn't tear myself away from the redhead. I spent more nights alone in our home than I did with him in my arms, but strangely enough that was okay with me. Even though I would prefer to hold him in my arms I couldn't possibly take him away from where he belonged. This was home, but he didn't want to chase the streetlights back to me just yet. If all I could do is leave the light on then that's all I'd ever do, just so he knows that I'm still here waiting.

Every morning though is a race to the mailbox or a mad dive for every phone that even dares to ring in my presence. Every letter and call were always supposed to be from him, but more often than not they weren't. On the other side of the world I knew he loved me, but his love for the world shone brighter than I could ever even attempt to. I often got lost in the dark and some days he wouldn't find me, but how could he with his head in the clouds? I never blamed him because in some country with a name I couldn't pronounce I knew he was smiling, that alone was enough to encourage me to seek out the light.

More than once I was advised to just move on and stop waiting for someone that could never stay home for longer than a week before leaving again for a few months. It was difficult and there were many days I nearly broke up with him over the phone, but something stopped me every time. It was a realization that I didn't even know I had understood all along.

No matter what happened, I was completely obsessed with waiting for Lavi to come back to me. At first I thought the only obsession present in our relationship was Lavi's infatuation with everywhere but home though that proves to not be the case. If anything, mine was even worse. I had given up trying to keep him with me but the feeling of waiting for him became important to me. That feeling alone proved to me on those lonely nights or the days where I hid my tears in my sleeves that I'd still love Lavi even with thousands of miles between us.

Somewhere else I know he's thinking of me and that's enough for now. He'll come home again soon, that's all that matters in the end.


	2. That XX

**~*Prompt two! This one is very close to me because I based it off of my experience with being cheated on. I was in Allen's place and my best friend was in Lavi's. It was a very horrible time in my life and I've always wanted to write about it and I feel this does it some justice. But yeah, I also based it of the song That XX by G-Dragon, hence the title.*~**

"I don't want to hurt you."

Allen, you have always been my best friend. We spent late nights talking and even later nights in silence. I was always there to make you laugh or comfort you when the demons within dragged you down. You used to come to me without a second thought, even when all you wanted to say was nonsense. I always listened. I always let you in.

It hurts to use past tense when talking about you. It went from 'Allen and I' to 'Allen and him'. What had easily been my favorite combination flipped around to something I wish never became true. At first I was okay because I knew you really liked him. My own feelings could easily be set aside for your happiness as long as that beautiful smile never went anywhere. After a while that sunshine began to fade and I knew why. He had been cheating on you for a while and you had just begun to realize, but you would never say a word or come to me about it.

Admitting defeat wasn't something you were okay with, especially when the picture looked so pretty from far away. It didn't matter that you were cracking under the pressure. As long as you could smile then everything was alright. Though you forgot something, I'm not that blind.

"I'm sorry."

I know it hurts you Allen. I don't need to be there with you to know that you're laying in bed, clutching your phone and desperately waiting for him to call you and assure you for one more night that everything is okay. I know every text I send makes your heart beat a bit faster and a smile to break out onto your face, only for it to fall when you realize it's just me.

"That bastard doesn't love you."

I've seen you at your worst. I've held you while you cried. As far as I know, all he can do is give you pretty words with empty promises. When has one thing he ever said turned out to be what you actually wanted? I know he pressures you for things you don't believe in. Trust me, I've seen your phone and you know that. How many times do you have to say no for it to actually make a difference? Apparently not enough.

"You look happy...I'm happy..."

I've never said something so fake before in my life. You always used to call me out on all my masks until I finally admitted to you why they were there in the first place. I've seen things I wish I hadn't. You took it in stride, knowing that it meant a lot to me for you to be okay with how I had shattered. You never tried to fix me. Instead of smashing the pieces together and hoping for the best you sat next to me and helped me pick them up, setting them into pretty piles as you smiled at me. That was all I really wanted, that's how I fell for you. Do you see now why it hurts to see you this way?

"I don't know what to say anymore."

It just gets harder and harder to talk to you. Before this mess began I could talk to you so easily about anything, but now you've put up a wall. It doesn't take a genius to realize that you were blocking me out from the start. I wish I knew why...

"They say love is blind. Allen, you're so blind."

When are you going to stop pretending like everything is okay? Crying yourself to sleep isn't okay. That pain in your chest isn't okay. Lying to yourself like this isn't okay. Why don't you see that?

"Why are you the only one who doesn't know?"

You do know. He's done so much and you know about it well. That's what makes him exciting right? The fact that he's not the best yet at the same time he's perfect. You know all of this but you still pretend to everyone and yourself that he truly cares about you with another person hanging off his lips. It boils your blood and makes you want to scream doesn't it? I wish you would.

This won't go on forever. So tell me, what does your future hold Allen? Are you going to keep hurting yourself or are you going to let me in to fix this mess? Time will only tell I guess, though I wish I knew. I'd give anything to know...


	3. Shatter Me

**~* DAY 3 IM SORRY ITS SO LATE. And omfg I wrote the medical wing scene while listening to An Ode to You by SHINee and I started bawling. Holy crap that was hard to write*~**

"What do you mean he..." Allen choked out the words, not being able to think. He couldn't move, couldn't breathe. It was as if every piece of the world had suddenly stopped and left him behind, frozen in his own personal Hell.

She was lying. Lenalee had to be lying.

"N-No...no he's fine...he put you up to this! He's trying to play a joke on me!" All the previous hesitation exploded out of him in the form of a screaming accusation. This couldn't be real. Lavi was too much of a jokester with a sick sense of humor. It couldn't be anything but a joke.

"Allen, I'm sorry...I wish I didn't have to te-" Allen took off, running towards the medical wing as quickly as he could. Tears slid down pale cheeks, streaking over the ends of a bad memory and being left in the dust. As much as he refused to believe that any second of this was real the tears continued to come. The damn waterworks just wouldn't stop.

He pushed passed every person he met, their hands reaching out to hold him back. Fingers lost their grip as fabric was torn from their hold or left behind in their fingers. They all knew what was going on.

He was the last to know...

"Lavi! You asshole!" Allen screamed at the top of his lungs when he finally reached the medical wing. He knew that when he'd round the curtain his secret love would be sitting there on the bed. The redhead would crack a grin and make a jab about Allen's height, earning him a punch that would be well deserved. Allen would huff and plop down next to him, mumbling about how mean it was to play such dangerous jokes on him. Lavi would just pull him into his warm side and apologize as long fingers slid through white strands.

That's how it was always supposed to be.

Only it wasn't...

When he rounded the corner all that greeted the furious boy was a silent room that held the reason he got up in the morning. All the machines that usually would be beeping away the day were off and the chuckle from his love never came.

It was silent...so silent.

Allen dropped to his knees beside the bed and peeked up over the edge of the mattress. He waited for the brush of the older male's breath to push the red hair across his cheek or for a single green eye to crack open. He waited for the lopsided smile that would make his boyfriend's nose wrinkle slightly and his eye to sparkle. He waited for the calloused hand to brush his cheek as gentle as a feather but it never came. None of it ever came.

"Lavi...you asshole..." Allen reached his hand up and tangled his fingers with the ones along the edge of the blanket. His face buried into the mattress, stifling his whimpers.

"I thought you wouldn't leave without me..."


End file.
